A Passionaate Gospel Of True Love, by Poonam Uppal


I’ve heard from the readers of my blog that the ratings I give are almost always on the lower side, and the sarcasm I sometimes use while reviewing a book is outright cruel.
Well, to me, literature isn’t about making money. It isn’t a “business”. It isn’t about crass – what’s the word I’m looking for – randomness.
And that’s why, a book like A Passionaate Gospel Of True Love gets a low rating on my blog along with a high dose of vitriol.
Genre: Crass Randomness, Mass Confusion, Lass Rambling (unnecessarily)
Summary: This is an autobiographical work. Or so, Poonam Uppalclaims. It’s really hard to believe that. Our lady repeatedly hears voices from heaven that predict what’s coming next. Interestingly, all that keep coming next are a husband and an extra-marital affair. And who better to give this advice than Goddess Durga herself.
Characters: Moh Lal Rai – Babe, shut up! Were you having a stroke throughout the book? Is that why you repeat every sentence 50 times? Soorya – Bro, you don’t just meet a girl and say “Let’s sleep together; I wanna know if we’re compatible.” Nor is compatibility dependent only on sleeping together. Gaurang Rana (or Gaur (cute nickname, but isn’t that a wild bull or bison?): The third guy out to teach her some stuff (cos Soorya’s an idiot).
A million minor characters – Cos how else would your mediocre book run into 1084 pages? (Calling it mediocre is the highest form of flattery I can bestow upon it)
Language: Our author had a photographer friend who clicked pics of the famous Khajuraho temples. Unfortunately, she did not have a friend who is an editor. While I may excuse the punctuation errors (don’t even ask!) I do have to speak about the redundancy and unnecessary length of the sentences. I mean, why would you write this: These loud voices premonitions, forecasting and predictions prophesizing my future. Or this: mentally deranged and berserk. And why can’t you simplify this: I approached and greeted the three people who were sitting to take the interview. They’re called interviewers, duh!
Why do people translate sentences directly to English from their mother tongue? That’s pathetic, to say the least. Like this: he is called the khota sikka. KS are people who do not have stand of themselves. Huh? Moving on…
Oh and someone please tell me why is “passionate” spelled like that!
Layout: Excessively detailed as already mentioned.
Very confused and amnesiac arrangement of placeholders.
There are people who hear divine voices telling them to write books. These people are spiritual, apparently, but also narcissistic and delusional. Why am I saying this? To find out, you can order it here.
Rating: 1/5
Note: This book was sent to me for review by @share_books
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